Commitment

I've found myself in a dating slump again, but spring is here and summer's coming. I expect to strike up conversations at barbecues and to spot good looking men at New York street fairs. I used to loathe dating, find myself disinterested in the pursuit nearly as soon as it began. No longer, not for the last year or so. I've been the girl up for a date with the guy who seems nice enough, who engages me in interesting conversation, throws in a good joke. Why not? I've encouraged myself when I can feel the request for the number approach. I don't regret any of them, but I am looking for something I haven't found in any of them. Come to think of it, not sure I've ever found. I know blanket statements will get us nowhere.

They could all keep their nice dinners and the seemingly sincere, if otherwise motivated, compliments. Or if you're incapable of commitment, don't even bother. Not the commitment of a Tiffany's ring or even necessarily the commitment of a relationship. I'd just like some follow through. You like me you say? Call when you're supposed to. You want to go out on Saturday? Follow up on that email invite. We have a special bond that you don't share with any other woman? For God's sake, don't let me get away.

When I got my first job 7 years ago, I walked in and thought I'd be out of there in two years tops. It didn't happen, but I never thought it was a conscious choice I made. The years passed, but they passed day by day. I wouldn't have gotten to the years if I didn't commit to the day. When these 30 something men avow their desire to get married, how will they commit to years when they can't commit to the day?